As You Like It
by trim
Summary: Illumi introduces a few new concepts to Killua, to his younger brother's dismay.


**As You Like It:** Concrit encouraged, as usual, etc. Due to the content of Illumi and Killua's conversation (it's not all that disturbing to me, but everyone else is not me, so...), the rating has been adjusted as such.

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"Killu," Illumi said as he slid into the seat next to his younger brother. "Have you been given _the talk_ yet?"

Killua blinked, mildly surprised at Illumi's sudden entrance into the kitchen. A metal spoon was clasped in his hand, his mouth in mid-chew of what he was currently eating.

"The talk, aniki...?" Killua trailed. His mind spun around in slight confusion as to what his brother was referring to. Then it suddenly clicked. "Oh, _the talk_...! Yeah, um, I've been given the talk already."

Illumi raised a slender eyebrow.

"Have you?"

"Yes, Milluki explained it to me already." Killua felt a small smile rise to his lips, amused that this little bit of information had managed to slip past Illumi. It wasn't very often that his older brother was unaware of what Killua was up to. Seated next to him, Killua saw that a somewhat puzzled look managed to surface past Illumi's usually expressionless face.

"That's odd. Father said that it would be up to me to tell you." Illumi lifted his elbow to rest it on the table. He turned towards Killua. "Well, at any rate, repeat what Milluki said to you about the talk."

Killua shrugged his shoulders. "Milluki showed me some stuff on his computer, but basically, he was just saying stuff like 'when a man and woman like each other very much, they go on to complete their relationship by--'"

"Killua, that wasn't what I was referring to." Illumi stated. Killua became confused.

"What?"

"I guess you haven't been given the talk yet. We should get started, then." Illumi stood up from his seat for a moment, and turned his chair to face Killua. He sat back down, staring intently at Killua. He cleared his throat.

"Killu, you know that anything that lives, must die someday, right?" he began. Killua nodded, still unsure of which direction this conversation was leading.

"People live, and people die. The ones they leave behind mourn their loss. This is natural of ordinary people." Illumi continued. "However, we as Zaoldyecks are not ordinary people. We are assassins. We do not mourn the people who die, even if they're family."

"But Aniki--" Killua interrupted.

"Quiet. Let me finish. It would be weakness to despair over the death of loved ones. We are strong. We accept their passing and move on with life. As the ones who deal out death to others, we must be able to deal with the same circumstances ourselves. In order to kill efficiently, you must be able to cope with the possibility of dying yourself. People do not live forever. We must grasp this concept as soon possible, and diminish our natural fear of death.

"So, Killu, if you were to die this very day, I would not mourn for you. Father will not mourn for you. Mother might shed a few tears or two, but that would only be because you were to be our heir. Do you understand, Killu?"

Killua was terribly confused and hurt by what Illumi had just said. If he understood him correctly, Illumi was then basically saying that no one cared about him, if they wouldn't mourn for him when he died.

"Aniki, does that mean you don't care whether I live or die?" Killua said, a slight tremble to his voice. "What's the point, then, if you don't care?"

Illumi's eyes widened a slight minuscule fraction.

"Killua, you've got it all wrong!" he reached out to put his hand on Killua's shoulder. Killua flinched somewhat. "I never said that we didn't care about you. We love you very much. It is because we love you, that we won't mourn for you."

Killua struggled with this strange concept. Illumi sighed.

"Killua, death is natural. Why agonize over it? Dying doesn't mean a person's life has come to an end. It merely means that their physical body grew too weak to carry on its wordly existence. One is better off without a body, in my opinion, if their body is too decrepit to execute even the most basic functions of living. Who knows where the dead go after they pass on." Illumi gave Killua's shoulder a strong squeeze. "Do you understand?"

Killua gave a small nod, more out of the desire to end this morbid conversation than out of honest comprehension. Illumi appeared satisfied.

"Good. I'm off then. I hope you think a little more on this, Killu."

With that, Illumi rose from his seat and exited the kitchen as quickly as he came in. Killua stared at the vacant space Illumi left behind.

"I've got to get out of here, someday," Killua muttered, as he went back to eating.

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HxH copyright Togashi and all respected owners. 


End file.
